I wanted to do a post about my weekend. So much happened for me and I sit here not knowing how to start the post....
It was a journey of self discovery.
It was a test to see what my body could handle - see it's limits.
It was a test to see how hard I could push my body until it buckled - see if I could push those limits.
It was a mental battle.
A huge mental battle.
.....it was also the start of something...something I plan on repeating many times.
The weekend was filled with fun with the in-laws and my family in Calgary. We went to pick up my race package which was so exciting! Seeing my name on the race bib was an adrenaline rush in itself.
May 26 (race day!) started out bright and early at 5am! My friend Deb (AKA marathon pace bunny master) picked me up at my in-laws house and we went to get the C-train to take to Stampede Park. Once we got there, we checked our bags and tried to mentally prepare ourselves for the race ahead. 7am start time.
Deb was a Running Room pace bunny, so she was constantly answering questions people had about the pace she was going to run, and the crowds grew. I stood there, knowing I was ready, but second guessing myself. "Well, moment of truth", I kept telling myself "This is when we see what you're made of"... "Are you gonna walk?" "Can you keep up to Deb and her pace group?" "Okay, I know I'm strong, I can do this!" "Okay, CAN I do this?!" Mental battle even before the run began. Excitement and nervousness were at a high.
My run inspiration, Deb:
The run started - people are running so close to you that you feel like this big army running forward. I felt good. Legs felt strong, breathing felt great - excitement indescribable. That moment right there is why people get addicted to running these races I bet. So many people around you all with the same goal - to cross that finish line as fast as their body can handle. What a rush.
For the first hour we ran through downtown Calgary and along the river.
I felt amazing - I could keep up with Deb and felt fast. I was running a 10:1 pace - that means I ran for 10 minutes and then walked for 1, and then repeated a zillion times hahaha! The route was great - people cheering on the side of the route the whole way with signs of encouragement to keep going, or funny signs to make you laugh as you ran. Some inspirational, some silly. My body felt amazing - 1 hour down, over 10k behind me, legs felt good, breathing as if I was sitting on the couch....was on track to finish in the time goal I had (2hrs - lofty goal as it was my first half-marathon ever, but I wanted it bad!).
There is one section of the race that was brutal for me though - if you see on the course map above, there is one section on the west part of the map where you run west, do a turnaround, and then route back. That was a very hard mental battle for me. I would see others stop and walk, and I would think "They stopped, I can too". I could feel the lactic build-up in my hips and it hurt. I started feeling hot (sun was beating down at that point) and started making excuses for walking. I stopped at every water station (they have them about every 3k) and drank.
Then a little voice in my head said "If you walk any more, you're gonna regret this". There it was. My mind was kicking me in the butt. I looked over at the river....saw 2 geese fly over. "Okay, let's reset here. "
I ran. And ran hard. I had to stop for little walk breaks, but from about 17k on, I pushed and pushed through the pain. Once we rounded the corner and I saw the sign for stampede park, I knew I had to be close. The crowds along the side of the route were getting thicker. Hundreds of signs in their hands holding encouraging messages.
At 21k, I only had 0.1k to go. I saw the grandstands! I popped my ear buds out and the cheering was reallllly loud. Only then did I realize that a full marathoner was gaining beside me in the opposite lane. I had to beat this guy. He was finishing a full marathon in the time I was running a half. CRAZY in itself, so I ran.
The fantastic part was that the crowd went crazy when they knew the full marathoner was coming in. So when I finished the race about 15 seconds before he ran through his red ribbon at the finish line, I had an erupting crowd cheering. I decided their cheering was for me (HA!) and ran across that finish line with a huge smile on my face.
Nothing like that feeling in the world.
Nothing.
Absolutely nothing.
That was the moment I had been training for, for months.
That was the moment I had doubted myself about.
That was the moment I knew deep down that I could tackle.
This was taken about 30 seconds after I crossed the finish line:
My goal was a 2-hour half marathon. I finished in 2hr26min.
This could look like a let down. But believe me, all I am is proud.
The funny thing, is that now I wanna beat that time.
Anyone who knows me, knows that I like to push my body to exhaustion. Complete exhaustion. Just to see what I can handle. Then I have a line - and I plan to cross that line and improve it.
I know my training the last few months was altered, and even haulted for almost a month due to bad shin splints, so I know I did the best that I could considering.
I also know that I deal with bad lower back problems - disc herniation, anterolisthesis, spinal stenosis; I'm a walking lower back mess!!
But is that going to stop me?! No way! I'm gonna keep pushing, and finding ways to improve my back and shin health, and be able to do the things I love, like running. Those phsical disappointments (to me) are not an excuse, they are a challenge to overcome.
And I think I did just that.
I also think that you could do something like this. And I don't mean a half marathon.
I think you could do something you never thought you could ever do though.
Is that a 5k race? Is that a full marathon? Is that going to your local climbing wall and trying it out? Is that joining a gym? Is that playing basketball with some friends during your lunch break? Is that walking to and from work?
Is it something that scares you?
I'm not trying to be cheesy, but this race changed my life. Something changed within me this last weekend. I went for a run yesterday, and places where I usually stop to take a breather walk, I kept running. I knew I could go farther. My mind changed this last weekend.
Self doubt left.
I know the next marathon race will be different. I will mentally prepare myself for all that silly self talk that goes on. I'm planning on another half marathon this summer - one in Edmonton, and then possibly one in Drumheller in September if I can.
I know I can do it. Because I took that scary leap, and did it.
And I have an experience, and a big 'ol medal to prove it!!
FYI - next summer is the 50th anniversary of the Calgary Marathon Weekend (marathon, half marathon, 10k and 5k races). June 1, 2014.
Be there???
Lots of love,
Naomi